Edoardo Ballerini

I saw an actor at an audition the other day I’d not seen in many, many years.  He’s older than I, and it took me a second to place him.  His face was gaunt, his shoulders hunched, and he looked like he hadn’t slept, bathed or eaten in a week.  Poor soul, I thought, he’s had some tough times…

After a moment, a second actor, cut from the same cloth, sauntered over.  The two recognized each other, greeted a fond hello and started in on some idle chatter that soon turned into a litany of complaints, laced with profanities and full of bile.  It was uncomfortable for anybody within earshot.  Endless moans about part time bar jobs, unemployment and getting old.

I looked over and asked myself, “What is to stop me from becoming one of these guys in twenty years time?”  They must have gone forth, as younger men, never dreaming that one day they’d be reduced to this.  Who or what is to say that I will be any different?

But then it struck me.  Today is the future I created yesterday, and tomorrow is the future I’m creating today.  It’s in what I do right here, right now, moment to moment.  And suddenly I was lit up with gratitude.  Not for all the privileges I enjoy, but for the ability to see clearly what is at stake, and to recognize my part in it.

I know exactly what will determine whether I wake up one day a bitter old man.  It’s whether I wake up right now.

For the Mineralava Musings, this is Edoardo Ballerini.